16 Ramadhan 1429 September 16, 2008

Which means another 14 days approaching Eidul Fitri

10 days before my brother fly to L0nd0n…ICL to be exact.

Most probably my family will come to KL -against the wave of  ‘balik kampung’ troupe. Only later we’ll go back to hometown. Can’t really confirm on this…as usual my dad can be anything that he wants to be. I wish this year he’ll have some consideration of berhari raya at our house instead of another ‘kampung’.

I plan (me and hby) to have pre raya just for my brother. Berbuka puasa with the raya food,such as rendang,nasi minyak (our must be delicacy) and some kuih raya. I hope our big family can attend the gathering.

I plan to get my brother some present too. He’s excellency should be rewarded, but I can’t figure out yet….can’t afford for lavish present , due to tight budget. (So sad). Initially want to give him a watch, mobile (but UK ’s lines is different-so cancel), or digital camera….or perhaps books. Hmm I think book (motivation and Islamic book) can be a great gift too…and get all of us to sign autograph on it!.

Tomorrow I will attend open sou*rce course at CbJya. (0-es-si-si). Hmm quite blur of what will be the input…it will be for 2 days. Just hope that I can deliver the tasks assign with excellent……

Office as usual…rumours crwaling all over the place, but can’t really tell which one is true or just ‘halwa telinga’. But no matter what u always need to be alert with that *wink*wink*.

Yesterday went for berbuka puasa with old friends. (x-@str0.)….Such a great gathering and enjoy it. JUicy gossips….what happening in the old workplace and our new environment….Trully I miss @stro….I love my job there (compared to now)…but it’s too much. I don’t want to jeopardize my family for that….so sorry my dear @stro, I have to leave u behind. My team has shrinking…and I think in bad shape now….from 5 ppl, one by one resign and now left with none except 2 new ppl. Hmmm user complaints on the information availability and integrity….:(…hmm blame no one except the mgmt…who don’t appreaciate us!

Hmmm my current job? Stay strong and prove to them you’re the best!

Happy Ramadhan September 6, 2008

6th Ramadhan 1429

Blessed with Ramadhan.

My brother scheduled to fly to Londo*n on 27th Sept. 3 days before Aidil Fitri. Will become ICL( Imperi*al Colle*ge Lond*on) student. Have some glitched with the offer letter. They seems that have misplaced or some technical issues and haven’t send the offer letter. Alhamdulillah it has been resolved last week (after everyday calls to Lond*on, nagging the registrar office to expediate the process). So now the letter will be departed from Heath*row Airport soon and hopefully by Monday will get to KL. So due to that few process have been postponed eg the vi*sa, the funding and contract with YT. I hope no more glitch after this. Pity my brother….Ya Allah, permudahkan urusan adikku ini. He has been study hard to get the place in ICl, so please don’t let the technical issues holding him back. He got 3As and 1B for A Le*vel.. -Maths,Physics,Computing and B -Further Maths). Alhamdullilah. He even got the best student for Comp*ting Subject during the college graduation ceremony). I hope he can catched up with the studies in ICL later, which give me some kind of worry. I know it is tough university, ranked after Oxf*ord and Cambrid*ge.

The Ramadhan so far , great. Last week was packed with course. Proje*ct Mgmt Course-10 Step by Proje*ct Mgmt Institu*te. Hmm those who work as PM /PMO must know about this. Me and M*l the junior officers have some bored and though time to finish the course. Yaaa…it’s way to high for us to catch up.Theoritically can understand but to share the knowledge, we;re still lack of it. Most of the participants are our bosses…so it’s quite interesting hearing and get to know the true colors of IT industries in Govt Sector. Anyway I value the knowledge that I gain from the course. (heheh and get the bosses to recognose me as well!)

This month also I choose to work from 7.30am till 4.30 pm. Sound early right? But believe me, most people also choose to go to work early. I thought I can easily get to office because I leave early…but everyone else did the same thing too. Aiyooo…back to normal I guess.

Haven’t apply for Raya Leave. Probably 1 1/2 weeks? 2 weddings to get involve and 2 farewell abroad. My brother 3 days before raya and my SIL 4 days after Raya. Good luck both of you!….

—–>I also wish another luck this month…may our project no2 succeed.

So mad …. August 27, 2008

I’m so mad now.

Some people just don’t know the importance of time.

Time is MONEY!

I’ve been nagging this for quite some time and yet, these people are so ignorant

Now who wasted? Your own  money, you work and people lose faith on you too!

I am so particular with time management and I am really MAD now.

Don’t say you want to gain 10K per month if you don’t turn up for the meeting due to your lack time management and how bad you are to get up from those damn bed!

I shall start the new routine now and more rules or else the whole generation will be lazy *** like those!

D*MN again, and I am really sick when I knew that they are having this bad habits eversince then! How hard can I tune them to wake up early!

I believe rezeki itu sangat mencurah-curah di waktu pagi!

And those ppl just love to sleep again after the Subuh prayer.If they sleep for just 1 hour, it’s okay for me…but then if Zuhr time only then they wake up, what kind of people are they? So lazy !

I need to control this and might as well put the big bell on the middle of the house.

Warghhh sakit hatiku sakit sungguh hati ku.

I don’t care how late you slept last night, but whenever you have meeting to attend, please ensure that you attend it! It is money! oKay..money…Time for grieving is over…even me who lost the most important person in my life, still standing strong and behave strong despite of the emotional rotten inside me.

Take out your lazy attitude-plus too much sleep that you breed within your clans.

Hate to say that, but lemas-lemas-lemas!

May dreams come true August 25, 2008

I always wanted to further my study.

For doctorate

and further it overseas.

Sungguh tinggikah cita-cita ku ittew?

Haksss. Tak apa cita cita tinggi dan selalu bayangkan.Ibarat Law of Attraction yang aku baru bentangkan semasa Public Speaking hari tu. Ada tiga steps yang senang,

1. Ask
2. Believe
3. Receive

Jadinya…..aku mmg dah aim and pinta  dan set minda aku yang aku nak further study kat UK…chewasshhhh

Believe dengan apa yang aku pinta dan yakin (termasuklah usaha-usaha juga)

Receive..akan come out along the way

Untuk membuat cita-cita aku tercapai memang kena mula dari awal.

Area of Research

Where (Which Uni)

So must know the requirement dah

When-Period

The supervisors

Other preparation (like IELTS or TOEFL) hmmmm

That’s the technical parts

On the other side, I have to start now, doing the research on my own.

For example:-

Publish articles

Publish papers

Research

Actively involve in the area that I want to pursue

Hmmm still along way to go

Another technicality is, I must wait at least 5 years, only then I can apply. That is because I want a sabbatical leave and fully sponsored by my employer (you-know-who). By 5 years time, I’ll be five-and-thirty , and bear in mind than the closing age for the sabbatical offer is at forty. Oh dear, that’s so rigid? (can I say so).

I really hope that I will get that scholarship anyway. InsyaAllah…we can always planned and who know in future the policy will change?

We’ll never know……..

Refreshing…. August 24, 2008

I changed the bedroom layout.

Feel great about it. So fresh and my room looks different and bigger. Only that we don’t change the furniture. (No budget). I wish we change sync the furniture as well…plus the curtain. But anyhow it is okay. As long as it got new looks and ‘feel’ I love it. Anyhow my still rent the house . Only if it’s our house, I would paint and redecorate it.

I have new hairstyle. Hmm not really new, but no more long hair. Now I’m layered-shoulder length hair girl. (Errr betul ke ayat ni?). Short,simple and layered. Well it is the most important. I have thick hair, so by layering it, I feel so light. No more ’sanggul’ before putting my tudung. And easy ,manageable while sleeping and ***.

Before –> After

Apart of that, I rent few books. My rent bookshop have moved to new place. Just realise it when I went to the old shop and found it empty. So asked the information counter and luckily the receptionist kindly give me the address of the new location. Went there and found out the owner have changed too. I guess because of the management, that’s why it move out from SP. Anyway the books still the same plus lots of new books. Rent 2 books and shall return back within 3 months. It just that it quite cramp over there and the traffics is quite something….aiyrakk…that’s what I don’t prefer, the rest no problem.

Me and books is inseparable. From small I love reading book. Until now..any kind of books..i read. Even when I’m at new company, whenever I know there’s a library, I’ll go to the library. Well in private there’s nothing much….so when I’m in this new department, I’m so happy. We have large library with variety of books. Oh I’m so in love and whenever I feel pressure or tense or bored…I’ll go to the library and find my serenity there. Hahhaha…

Even the same with the book shop. O love bookshop and I also feel the same temptation whenever I enter to the bookshop. The smell of the books and the nicely arrange, really excite me. Kinda give some sparks and my eyes really blinking-blinking hahaha…(another exaggerating)

Tomorrow another week will start. Wish will be better than yesterday!

Another great news is, my bro will fly to Impe*rial C*llege L*ndon. I’m so happy and deep inside I wish I could be there too. Further study abroad. Hmmm perhaps there’s still hope. My doctorate in 5 years time? InsyaAllah…I have start looking and research on some Universities…and plan of my research-to-be. Insyallah Again…I’ll work hard for it!.

UCL? Bristol?Warwick?Leeds?Southampton? Hmmm…

Done…and now waiting for the answer August 8, 2008

Finally I managed to finish all the procedures in order to get my confirmation.

This morning went to PKK for the security interview.Such an interesting experience. 1 polic*e interview me and my friend too. Which is not that bad, though I did fill out the form inaccurately. Just that. Compared to my friend, he got scolded kaw-kaw…ermm dunno why. My dear friend (E*na) also plays a good role. Well she’s my friend and know me well pun. So nothing to hide since I’m ‘clean’ too. InsyaAllah….finish the intvw at almost 11.30 am, and we headed to PY*ramid..huhu another mission

The mission is to find the infamous J*Co D*onut. No queue at all! I bought 1 dozen and treat E*ena 1/2 dozen….then we went to Star*B*ucks….me as usual the choc…(apa dah nama die). E*na introduce me to her UT- Under T*A… sounds good and it’s medium risk, so I decided to join….at least the money can grow more compared to conventional saving or normal shares. **Listen to the advise of our Pension Manager…invest invest invest and let the money grow for you!

Done with those discussion, sent E*ena tu Commuter station…sorry friend, actually she prefer the KJ L*RT but, quite far and I still need to do some errands. On my way back, it’s raining heavily, plus I’m so sleepy. Due to coffee? Hmm I dunno….stop at pharmacy and bought the medicine for selsema…(pity my son still not 100% recover). Finally reached home at 2pm…They (Hby, Son & my brother) were so excited when I showed them the J*Co…my son especially…was amazed with the decoration of the donuts!

Then rest and sleep…can’t do laundry since it’s still raining…me dozed off….

This weekend we’ll headed South to attend my cousin’s wedding….unofficially invited..the bride nor the family invited us directly, but just pesan memesan to my father…der…a bit hangin because the bride is working in KL and even the brother of the bride also work here! But none of them make an effort to call me or the sedara what so eve!. Maybe I’m just a plain cousin who meant nothing to them….so ikutkan hati, I’m so malas to attend the wedding….well we’ll see how it goes!

My son still not 100% recover from flu…i guess we need to keep the aircond on all the time…especially nite. last nite we stiched it off because he coughing badly, but then after few hours, the temp risen…aiyarkk… so we quickly gave him PCM and turn the aircond back…and this morning before I go to work…he seems okay…sleeping peacefully…no cough and the temperature is back to normal.

and the best part is, he called himself abang **** (his name)…aiyarkk which give others a questionable looks..am i pregnant? Hmm not yet…but soon insya allah and I can see that my son really want adik so soon…!

I need a break August 5, 2008

It’s been a busy duper busy weeks for me. Starting from 16 July until yesterday (4th August)

Week 1

My induction course started.  Attend classes from morning till evening 5 days a week. The course coordinator have passed us the assignment to do. We have group assignment (6 questions) and individual assignment (8 questions). Well since we’re still in week 1 +plus 3 days classes from previous week, I haven’t started doing it yet. We went to class (I left home 6.30am everyday)…but back at home 6pm paling lambat pun. So it’s still okay from me.  We played bowling and futsal and have lots of fun although the classes were packed. Not to mention we build relationship…some P.P.T and P.T*M too.

Week 2

Is our final week..,,we have exam on Thursday and need to submit the assignment. Lucky our group was very committed, so we managed to complete everything on Tuesday, and I went back to office to print, bind and make photocopy for every members. Fuhhh lega satu kerja. My individual assignment also have completed. I allocate my weekend to settle the assignment…and ready to bind it too. Alhamdulillah. Now it’s time to study. This induction examination is very tough and important. The worst part is, it’s cover everything about the civil service. Aduihh mak aii. P*erintah A*m, Pe*keli*ling (P*KPA), Ara*han K*eselamatan, Da*sar-D*asar Ne*gara, Mala*ysia  dan macam macam lagilah. I read every books and the most important things is So*alam R*amalan tu!. Thx to my officemate who lend me the notes!.

Still the day before exam, we have small feast…nak tak nak we have to attend it lah kan. During that week, it’s really hectic and tiring….went to class from 6.30 am…until 6pm…Night need to settle down the house chores…and curik curik masa to study. Normally I slept just 3 to 4 hours..just to study, understand and memorize all those facts and figures. Sungguh penat. But I think alhamdullilah I still can answer it. What I read come out in exam so bolehlah jawab. But then just after the exam, we straight went for another course. and this the the last and though one!

Week 3

From the induction course, we went to B*TN course in Me*ru. Alhamdullilah not that far…still in Selan*gor. Since I’ve been in BT*N before…I have set my mind and ready for any challenge ahead. We reached Me*ru around 4pm, and quickly register ourselves. Me, Y*an and Z*ulf*a in the same dorm, plus M*az, I*zan, Z*ura and Y*amu*na. Together with us are U*G4*1 group (civil servants knowlah). Well from that moment the though life started….for 5 days.

(Day 1)

Just briefing and election of P*enghulu…we picked the same P*enghulu as induction

(Day 2)

4.45am-wake up, bath and subuh prayer at musolla

6.45am-Kuliah subuh at hall

7.15am-Marching and exercising

7.30am- Breakfast

8.15am- Lecture at hall -break at 10.30am for brunch then continue the lecture

1pm-Lunch and Zuhur Prayer

2pm- Lecture again

5.15pm- Exercise and marching (we did fitness test)

7.15pm- Dinner

7.30pm-Maghrib prayer and kuliah maghrib

8.15pm-Lecture again…..

11.30- Supper

12.30- baru boleh tido (paling awal lee)

Well that’s how it goes…cuma the exercise tu differs…We did flying fox, repelling, run for 2 kilometers under 24minutes (penat tau turun naik bukit curam).Fuhh..but syukur because I am able to finish it. Apart from lecture we also have LD*K..and discuss lots of things….plus simple group presentation (so fun)..and watched some ‘argument’ here and there. It’s tiring…and tense (because handphone not allowed)…and we also do not know what is happening outside there…no tv and paper…apa lagi internet!

We have exam plak tu…and need to pass it. Hmmm they did provide the books….punyalah kami study, but tak masuk pun exam…hampesh…so berbekalkan pegetahuan am aku and bekas bekas hafalan semasa induksi tu…dapatlah jugak jawabnye…….After exam ader kembara…naik turun bukit…but takdelah masuk paya apa ke…..tak macam zaman aku skolah dulu…kami kena kejut kul 4pagi..semayang subuh tepi jalan…panjat bukit curam, buat repelling and lepas tu masuk paya. Fuhhh….

So sebab tu aku tak risau sangat le this time sebab takde mencabar fizikal sangat…but since aku ni dah bertambah umur…yang masa skolah tu 16 tahun je..mmglah kuat and cergas!…So aku take good care of myself lah juga…

Balik tu hby and opi*e amik kat In*tenGah….sian op*ie demam…agak panas juga….rindu M*ma kot sebab takleh nak call…plus mmg weekend tu macam macam aktiviti yang dibuatnya. Cuaca sekarang ni plak panas and sometimes berjerebu…tu yang payah tu….baca paper, ader pembakaran terbuka kat ngan area aku nih…aduihhh tensenlah!.

So kami dah beli aircond…akan dtg pasang besok…harapnye lepas ni things not getting worstlah…So far hari ni opi*e dah okay sket….harapnye malam ni tak demam dah sebab aku kena gi opis dah…patutnye hari ni masuk opis…but kesian anak demam and aku pun nak rest…so aku bagitau boss nak cuti..

boss jgn marah aku yerk!…

opie baik demam yer

orang pasang aircond…cepatlah datang

hby…thanks muah!

Thanks God it’s over July 21, 2008

I’ve done my public speaking today. I’m the 4th of all 67 course participants. Quite lack of knowledge and jury expectation. I’ve done my best and I hope the jury is really generous in giving the high marks. Compared to others, I came forward without any notes or cue cards…because I know I won’t be looking at it…(at all). I’m so used in using the slides, then when they said slides are not necessary so I go to empty handed. I have my intro, contents and able to conclude the speech. Only the nervousness is my weakness, Oh I hope people won’t noticed it much. **Cross Fingers**. Btw my title is ‘The L*aw O*f Att*raction’

My course overall went well, so far. We’re on 4th day actually, so too soon to tell. The first 2 days was group dynami*cs. The lecture only starts on Friday, (and the sleepy zone begins). I wish (want) to excel in this course and pass with flying colors. Still need to complete the individual assignments, group assignments as well as study for the exam. Insya Allah I’ll pass the exam.

The journey to P*J* was quite okay since 630am I’ve started my engine. It’s really early morning, but that’s the sacrifice that I have to make!. I normally reached the campus around 715 am -730am….and got ample time for breakfast and preparation and mangling with new friends!. It’s okay as long as i punch in before 8am. Punch out will be after 5pm, from looks like from today onwards…6pm will be the time (after the public speaking session).

People in my office were still excited for the opportunities meeting the royal highness. Hmmm I wish I can bee there too! But apakan daya!…stuck in this campus with the important course. The course mates so far are okay….67 and 29 are same grade like me. It’s time for ‘networking’!…Oh I shd take this opportunity to promote the seminar in August to all friends. Tomorrow will ask my secretary to print out and hand over the document to me.

Last weekend was quite tiring…..BIL and SIL #2 have a makan2 at their house (aqiq*h). It’s okay to come for makan2 and doa’…but looks like it’s more than that…MIL and FIL are busy with ‘menggulai’ and we the inlaws helping in lots of chores…saturday and sunday (no rest) for us. I wish they could understand life in KL , but unfortunately not…..If u want to it at kampung I don’t have any problem..but in KL..without any Public Holiday…oh they should pity us. No time for us to rest!…And actually they should just order and ask the caterer to prepare the food. Ntahlah….. as I told before, I need to prepare for my course and public speaking…so we left early, leaving the guest and the dirty dishes.Huhuhu…I’m the lazy menantu?…..

So I really thanks Allah the public speaking is over and the fest is over too. I can have lil bit peace of mind and focus on other tasks…(yang banyak bertimbun)

the intensive course July 18, 2008

The course has started. So now I’ve been commuting from PH to PJ through FHway everyday. The class will start at 8am (we need to punch in before 8am) till 5pm (punch out). So in order to arrive safely , and without traffic hassle I started my engine at 6.30 am from home. Oh dear, it;s really early…but believe me 7am at FH, the traffics was heavy already. I don’t know what will be at 7.30am. 7 am just nice and I still can reached PJ at 7.30am….compared to normal timing (15 minutes). So now, everyday I woke up at 5.30 am. Class so far ended 5 pm or 5.30pm, so I quickly rushed out (to avoid traffics jam). And great enough so far I reached home at between 5.45pm till 6.15pm. Yuhuu!

Talked about the course, it’s really packed and full of assignments and tasks. We need to do 8 individual asg, 6 group asg, 1 public speaking and test (objective+essays)-not an open book test.Grrrrr. **Cross Finger**.I want to pass in excellent insya Allah

Since today is Friday, me and colleague went back to office for a while. It’s quite near to the course center actually. No memo or letters on my table yet (hahhaa I’ve been away for just 2 days only). Checked emails and friends said there are rearranging the position (ur location) again.Derhhh…lucky our room was intacted. But still feel uneasy and kind like ‘deerrrrrr’ because the shuffle is just because 1-demn-anak-mommy-guy-that-just-come-back-from-doing-msc-pastu-terasa-dah-pandai-sangat. Huh…well let him be.Perhaps the ‘aura’ of getting the ‘higher’ education still big and make his nostril ‘kembang’ lagik. Well beb! Sorry brother MSc is nothing now! Lots of peeps getting it and from my experience MSc is not difficult compared to first degree! And PhD too..(this is what my boss said because I haven’t do my PhD yet!). So because of this mangkuk hayun, some peeps have to reshuffle the working place, padahal we’re just do that 4 months ago!. Eiii…(I started to have some kind og bad perception about him). Huh …
————————————————–

Family thingy!

SIL & BIL #3 just give birth to baby boy (at last) after they have 2 girls. They gonna have the aqiqah this sunday..which means I need to turn up on Saturday (helping….) and Sunday (helping and makan…..) Ohhh…well not to say I don’t want to go. (it’s an obligation maaaa). But just to tired when thinking about how busy I am…with asg and the time to study…and preparation for BeeTee-N.Hmmm but what can I do, have to force myself and help here and there la. Hmmm no comments on this…(but napalah cepat sangat u getting the 3rd one, rasa baru je aku gi tolong aqiqah anak no 2 hari tu) . Aduiihhh sakit jiwaku. Yup, the tense have risen because ppl keep asking when is our 2nd baby will arrive. Aiyooyoo…only if the baby can be produced at the fingertips dah lama dah aku buat tau!.

I better stop now, need to start doing the asg.

Tomorrow will be ‘jalan-jalan’ to KL…looking for white baju kurung actually, for my BeeTee N…warghhhh…and isyaallah…after passing all these things..and the security interview, I can be confirmed soon! Yuhuuu….

Ayat-a*yat Ci*nta July 11, 2008

Ro*ssa – Ay*at Ay*at Ci*nta

Desir pasir di padang tandus
Segersang pemikiran hati
Terkisah ku di antara cinta yang rumit

Bila keyakinanku datang
Kasih bukan sekadar cinta
Pengorbanan cinta yang agung
Ku pertaruhkan

reff:
Maafkan bila ku tak sempurna
Cinta ini tak mungkin ku cegah
Ayat-ayat cinta bercerita
Cintaku padamu
Bila bahagia mulai menyentuh
Seakan ku bisa hidup lebih lama
Namun harus ku tinggalkan cinta
Ketika ku bersujud

Bila keyakinanku datang
Kasih bukan sekedar cinta
Pengorbanan cinta yang agung
Ku pertaruhkan

repeat reff

Ketika ku bersujud